okay but can you imagine like

a week after your truck gets stolen out of the goddamn mall parking lot, you get a knock on the door and there’s fucking Captain America standing there. Says he’s here about your goddamn truck. And for a moment you wonder if he started working for the police now that Shield took a dive, but you don’t say so, you just nod when he describes your truck to you, license plate number, make, model and color, all to a tee. 

And then the weirdest thing happens (weirder than Captain America just showing up at your front door). Captain America starts looking bashful. And then he tells you your truck was lost ‘in the line of duty’. You must still look a little awestruck because he elaborates; he’s the one who took your truck. 

Captain America fucking stole your goddamn truck out of the goddamn mall parking lot.

And he’s going to pay for a new one. And he’s very, very sorry.

He comes with you to the car dealership, too. Because he’s so so sorry, also he gets military discount, so he can help you.
he is so so sorry
tagged → #captain america


i like how anthony mackie just played himself?? like he clearly went into the movie like “if i, anthony mackie, were the falcon, what would that be like? baller as hell, is the answer,” and just went with that




no one’s an atheist 30 seconds before an orgasm


that’s the spirit

tagged → #ass creed
  • Guy: What do girls do at sleepovers?
  • Me: Pass the Bechdel test.


If you’re ever feeling down remember Christopher Palu exists. 


Video Game Poster Designs - Created by Dylan West

Posters are available for purchase at the artist’s Etsy Shop.

tagged → #video game shit



you know what really gets my goat?

el chupacabra


I wonder if there are Quidditch “street rules” matches where everyone’s taking liquid luck and all spells are fair game

tagged → #harry potter
Things I Learned from Harry Potter:


  • Cats can’t read maps or signs
  • There’s no post on Sundays
  • You can’t cancel Quidditch
  • None of the above applies to Minerva McGonagall
tagged → #harry potter


but does the applause live for me?

help me do i take three classes on Tuesday/Thursday with a teacher I really or two classes each day with a teacher i don’t know?

tagged → #life of claire


If you think about it, Guy Man is the exact name a robot pretending to be human WOULD choose